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Here are 8 examples of how loving someone is different from being in love with them. You can choose to love someone. You can decide you will see their best qualities, appreciate them for who they are, and be a supportive partner to them.
A look into the psychology behind love.
You can also choose to stop loving someone, to walk away and forget about them. Being in love is not a choice.
Loving someone means wanting them to do well, being in love means putting them first. Of course you want the person you love to do well, but are you actually prepared to make the sacrifices necessary to make that happen? Maybe he chips in a little extra for rent while you get through graduate school, or maybe you take extra morning walk shifts with the dog because he loves to sleep in.
Loving someone is fleeting, being in love is forever.
Stop talking to your crush (if possible)
Love can literally end at any moment. It stays through the fights, the lulls, and the full blown existential crisis.
When the honeymoon phase is over and life gets a little more routine, only the relationship where you are actually in love will be a happy one. Loving someone means needing them around, being in love means needing them to be where they are happy. When you love someone, you always want them to be around. You crave them. You want them to be with you more than anything. When you are in love, you want them to have a happy balanced life, which means sometimes spending time away from you.
You want them to have time out with the guys, or alone time, or time to pursue some hobbies without you.
Loving someone is a rush, being in love is steady stream of emotions. Loving someone can be the greatest high, but it also comes with low lows. The roller coaster of loving someone can never last, and bad lows can be devastating. The intensity of the highs and lows is why so many people mistake loving with being in love, but the real deal will never make you feel like you are crashing and burning. Loving someone is about how they make you feel, being in love is about how you make them feel.
Loving someone means you are only concerned with how he makes you feel loved, special, or appreciated. Loving someone is about ownership, being in love is a partnership. When you love someone, you want them to be yours. Labelling them is important. You give yourself as much as you get.
The difference between loving someone and being in love with them
You two are a partnership, a team, and no one belongs to anyone. Loving someone is an uphill battle, being in love is effortless. Some days will be difficult.
Some days will seem to take everything you have. But at the end of the hard days, or the hard months, you will always feel that you are in love with each other. That feeling will never be work or effort.
Accept that your love for them won’t disappear overnight
Check out Relationship Hero a site where highly trained relationship coaches get you, get your situation, and help you accomplish what you want. Just …. Holly Harris Holly Harris is a freelance writer, full time student, and mommy to a toddler sass monster.
In her nearly nonexistent free time, you can find her lifting something heavy in her home gym or chugging vodka sodas with friends.
She contributes to several other sites, including Elite Daily. By Amanda Chatel. By Averi Clements.
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